Frankly, My Dear, I Don't Give A Damn

... but it's not your fault, Reader Nation! Here's the truth: I'm feeling all kinds of badly because I haven't blogged in a month. Which is why I've got to get this in now, before August is over, and things just fall by the wayside forever. But here's why I've brought you a title inspired by Rhett...

I'm getting married in a week. What does that have to do with "Gone With the Wind," you ask? Well, according to wikipedia, the venue is of some historical significance:

"On December 15, 1939, the Georgian Terrace Hotel’s Grand Ballroom was the site of the Gone with the Wind Gala, whose attendees included Clark Gable, Carole Lombard, Vivien Leigh, Laurence Olivier,Olivia de Havilland, Claudette Colbert, Victor Fleming, Louis B. Mayer, David O. Selznick, Margaret Mitchell, and several other notable guests. Contrary to popular belief, the premier showing of Gone With the Wind was not held at the Fox Theatre, but rather at Loew's Grand Theatre in downtown Atlanta. After the movie was screened there, its stars were ushered to the Georgian Terrace via a motorcade through a parade route on Peachtree Street."

Fact. s. Also I just learned that a nickname for the Georgian Terrace is "Grand Old Lady of Peachtree." Will be using that later this week for sure.

If you're worried about anything, don't worry. Eric has promised to be there promptly, without any surprise ironic facial hair. And I have promised to stand at the end of the aisle and yell, "I'LL WAIT" in my best teacher voice if he dares to try to make a day-of go at a monkey tail. Gross.

Am I being too sassy? Sorry. I'm just so excited. There are going to be so many people that we love, all in one place, and that's why I just can't give a damn about all of the last minute stuff that I know I should be caring about, and also how is one even supposed to accomplish actual real-life tasks when all you can do is think about how your brain is making this noise: gggggllhehhuhrhrhhhssllll while you stand there flapping your arms?

So, let this be the forum where I make the public apologies for the mistakes of the upcoming festivities.

1. I apologize for the color palette. I started thinking it would be cool to have purple and green, but I also really love coral. And blue. With some of those yellow ball things. Who doesn't love those? Also, red, orange, and indigo. Oh, and white. When people ask me what the colors are, I alternate between saying either "unicorn poo" or "clown vomit." I apologize if that is crude to you, but I must add: I'm the bride, so... maybe just avoid the question. Also, I DON'T KNOW what the suits look like, just like ERIC DOESN'T KNOW what my dress looks like, so if things don't match with each other, understand that we were literally blind in making these color coordinating choices. Come on, you guys, it'll be fun.

2. I apologize in advance to wedding guests who are mentally unprepared for a weekend wedding in Atlanta that coincides with DragonCon and Gay Pride. I hope that all will be able to keep in mind that this is a weekend about celebrating love, and set aside any other agendas for a brief minute.

3. If you end up at the Clermont Lounge, and sneeze and bruise your lip, I apologize for that.

4. I apologize to my nephew, Ryder, who will potentially discover that while he was being born, my college roommates and I were playing this song on loop as we danced around the dorm room. I hope that your impressionable mind will recover. Or, we can get a musical rendition of this song by Dr Newman to ease the pain. Or something.

5. Sorry about the other stuff that I can't think of right now because of the brain noise and arm flapping!

6. I apologize to the neighbors because it seems that this branch is just going to be stuck in the tree for a while. I tried hanging on it today to yank it down; no luck, just tree dirt in my eyes.

7. I apologize for the first time that the guest book falls down. Because it's not a book. It's giant Jenga, made by yours truly. I don't apologize for any subsequent falls. Those are all due to user error.

I think that's it for now. More to come, I'm sure.